8 Things Happy People Avoid

2. Having Expectations

Ah the rub! Most people think that unhappiness is caused by having unrealistic expectations. Not so. It's having expectations at all that sets us up for bitter disappointment. Dreams, hopes, and an optimistic attitude are the stuff that leads to happiness. Think about it. The words, dreams and hopes and optimistic, feel open and are filled with a sense of present and future movement. The word expectation is hard and static and unmovable. When you falsely expect others or events to be a certain, specific way, you are more than likely to be disappointed on a regular basis.

Fix: Look at life optimistically. Hope for the best. Hope is not a demand. Leave room for outcomes you may not have even thought of that may turn out to be even better than the ones you 'hoped' would occur. Click the link below for #3

11/22/2024 5:00:00 AM
Janet Valenty
Written by Janet Valenty
Former medical technologist with extensive drug testing and clinical chemistry experience. Traded the white coat for a business suit as Director of Marketing of a leading clinical lab with two billion in revenues and left that way back in the 90's. These days, doing more reading and publishing when not chasing grandchild...
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Comments
How bizarre that some comments are bitter or political. Laughing at those people right now. They are wallowing and will continue to wallow in their misery, their sanctimonious superiority. In the meantime, the rest of us WILL get on with our joy and happiness--two different things, as many of us know. Another item I would add to the list is carrying grudges, holding on to resentments. I always say I have so many real burdens on my back I don't have room to carry a grudge. Let go! Chin up! Carry on! You are not responsible for the misery, ugliness inside of others. Tend your own garden. Bear fruit. Share fruit. And keep on moving forward.
Posted by Peaches
What Crap!
Posted by Tlm Bush
This list looks like every progressive I have ever known.
Posted by Graywolf12
This list is so valid!
Posted by Monique Chambers
This list is priceless. I stayed in an abusive, painful marriage for 36 years. All that time I saw myself as a victim but what I did was wallow in self pity and I got so sick (both mentally and physically) that my doctor asked me point blank if I wanted to die. It was like he slapped me in the face. Did I want to die? At that point I thought I did. But I began to see I couldn't save my husband or my son and I walked out. (I had warned my ex for years that if I left I would never come back. Since I had threatened to leave for so long I don't think he believed I ever would. But I started on a new path where I incorporated the 'fixes' listed in this article. It'm now almost 16 years past the day I walked out and I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life. I keep telling my son that he is responsible for his own happiness. He can't get it from a relationship - it has to start with HIM. He's miserable all the time - and this is 4 years past the end of his second marriage (he's 42). I wish others well in their journeys in life. May you find what makes you happy and grab it and hold on tight. Life is a one way street - we get no more do-overs - so make the best you can of your life!!
Posted by Pamrojo
#2 is my nemesis! But I learned something here - it's not just too-high expectations that get in the way of happiness. It's all expectations. Wow. That was an eye-opener!
Posted by jamie
I've discovered that every time something bad happens, at least two good things are right behind, if I look for them. Sometimes there are as many as five blessings following something negative! Keeping your eyes open for them helps change your focus, and thus your attitude.

When I find myself judging someone harshly, I try to find something I can honestly compliment them on, and then I sincerely give them that compliment. This is another way to change your focus and attitude. :)
Posted by JMM
I'm going to send this out to my unhappy friend and ask her if she thinks it sounds like me. (it sounds like her of course LOL)
Posted by Kyle
Ya, when the mind reading starts up, that's my queue to crack open a beer and put my headphones on!
Posted by JP
The big one here for me is mind reading. I hate to admit it but it's true.
Posted by Edgar Humberto Martinez
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