Nurture Yourself During Times of Change

6 Ways to Honor Your Own Experiences

When you are going through a transition in your personal life or professional life, it’s normal to feel a bit vulnerable. You feel uncertain about what’s going to happen next and what’s going to unfold in the future. 

Depending on the circumstances of what has happened, you may feel shaken, unsettled, and worried. Holding it together and keeping the rest of your life going while you sort out what’s happened takes energy.

Focus on doing what you can to take care of yourself through this uncomfortable, potentially scary time. When possible, act in ways that support you in feeling better or at least more centered. 

Begin by listening to yourself. How you feel gives you clues to ways you can nourish yourself during this time. 

• When you feel tired, remember that going through any transition is exhausting. Your body is doing its best to catch up with itself after a big shift in your reality. Processing emotions and making sense of the unfolding changes takes a lot of energy. Before you start searching for solutions to fix your situation, focus on healing a bit first. Give yourself some time to refuel, rest, and recalibrate. When you feel more rested and centered, you’ll be in a better place to figure out your next steps.
• When you don’t feel safe, resist the temptation to override what you are feeling. Honor your need to protect yourself from difficult situations, hurtful people, or any non-essential task you don’t feel ready to handle at the moment. Creating boundaries and finding circumstances that give you a feeling of safety will strengthen the foundation you need to make good choices in the future. To support yourself during this time of change, create a warm, cozy refuge in your bedroom, home, or garden where you can go when you need to feel safe. If you aren’t comfortable at home, create a bag with some comfort items that you can keep with you so you can set up a safe space for yourself in your car during your lunch break, in a park on a sunny day, or at a friend’s house.
• When you feel lonely, reach out to people you trust. Focus on connecting with those who make you feel heard, seen, held, and respected. If you are in a time in your life when you don’t have many friends who can support you in this way, comfort yourself as best you can by honoring your own needs. Spending time with a snuggly pet, setting up a massage, joining a support group, or attending an inspiring event can also lift your spirits.
• When you feel rushed to make a decision, take action, or meet an arbitrary deadline, slow down. Give yourself time to figure out your next move. Take stock of your circumstances, talk to a trusted friend, and think through what makes sense to you right now. When a few more details are sorted out, you can come back later to make a longer-term decision.
• When you feel you don’t have enough information to make a good decision,  don’t force yourself to act. Instead, switch your focus to gathering more information. When you have validated the details of your situation, you’ll be in a much better place to make your decision.
• When you feel intrigued by something, pay attention. This insight is a good sign that you are spotting a clue to your future direction. Even if you can’t manifest exactly what calls to you in this moment, explore alternative ways to bring the essence of that clue into your life. 

To find your way through the changes unfolding in your life, it’s important that you honor yourself and your needs. By listening to what is true for you and doing your best to fulfill your needs, you begin to heal, keep yourself safe, and make decisions that help you move forward again.   

Carol McClelland Fields, PhD, an award-winning author and Board Certified Coach, provides inspiration and practical support for those who are in the midst of transition. Embrace a new relationship with change. Carol works with people globally, including professionals who work with clients in transition, as an emerging or seasoned coach, therapist, or other Change Catalyst. Download Carol's eBook, Riding the Waves of Change: Growing, Healing, and Evolving Through Times of Deep Uncertainty at www.CarolMcClellandFields.com.