Is it just me or am I a victim of circumstance?

Last week I took my car in to the mechanic. I had been experiencing a rather unpleasant vibration every time I braked and so I figured it might be time for a new set of brake pads. I was surprised when the service manager called to tell me I was actually in need an overhaul of my entire wheel assembly- 4 new rotors and all new brake pads. He recommended BMW parts and my surprise quickly turned to shock when he quoted me an estimate of 1300 dollars. I read him my credit card number through clenched teeth and secretly promised myself to drive slower.

A few days later my cell phone abruptly stopped functioning. I could not hear through the earpiece, but callers could hear me. When I took it into the local Sprint store they told me I had two options: buy another phone or have my broken one fixed at their headquarters 20 miles away. It could not be replaced because I had not opted for the 7.50 per month equipment replacement insurance program. Frustrated, I left vowing to change providers as soon as my contract expires next year. I called Sprint Customer support and after what seemed like 15 minutes of giving voice commands and pressing touch-tones, I was connected to a representative. After explaining my dilemma he told me I was eligible for 75 dollars off any new phone. "Fine! I said, I need a new phone ASAP" "OK sir, let me transfer you to sales" "What, why wasn't I connected to sales in the first place?" My sales rep was Mindy and after answering the same account security questions that I did for the first rep. she told me I was eligible for a 150 dollar discount off any new phone. Simultaneously I was thinking, "Wow, the first guy offered me only 75, maybe she made a mistake" while answering "Thanks so much Mindy, I'll take it" Then she asked what phone I would like- I told her I wanted the exact same model I currently had but then I was informed production for my model had been discontinued. "Would you like the new Beyonce phone?" she asked. "What!? Did you say "Beyonce?" OMG...

I received my new phone yesterday in the mail. After charging it for a few hours I turned it on. I was met by a blank, white screen. I turned it off and on again- still a blank screen. I opened the battery compartment, removed it, replaced it, and still- I was staring at a blank white screen. Confused, I told myself it must be some activation/security feature so tomorrow I'll take it back to the Sprint store.

This morning when I rolled out of bed I did not smell coffee. "That's odd" I thought "I know I remembered to set the time-delayed brew." Entering the kitchen I noticed- no coffee. "Hmmm...well, maybe I did forget." I pressed the on button and nothing. Perplexed, I pressed it again- nothing. I checked the plug- it was in the socket. My coffee maker appeared to be broken.

On my way to Starbucks I accidentally hit the rear passenger window button in my car. I pressed it again to raise the window and as it came up I heard a horrible crunching sound and it abruptly stopped halfway. I pressed the button- the window went down no problem, but again it stopped exactly halfway- preceded by the same horrendous crunching sound . "This must be a mistake I though to myself" After pressing the button at least 20 more times in the parking lot at Starbucks I drove home furious- my window still halfway open. A quick online search of the BMW forum informed me that my mechanical window regulator was broken and would need to be replaced. The forum author added that removing the entire door panel to replace the regulator was a complex and difficult process and did not recommend doing it yourself.

With my frustration mounting, I drove back to the Sprint store to activate my new phone. After turning it on the sales associate shot me an odd look and asked "Why is the screen blank?" "Uh- I don't know- doesn't it need to be activated" I said. "No sir, this phone is broken" was his answer. Suddenly, I found myself fantasizing about what might happen if a molotov cocktail were to be thrown into the middle of a Sprint sto- "Sir, excuse me sir? You'll need to call Sprint and have them send you another.." "But can't you replace it?" I asked "I'll need the original box it came in as well as all the accessories."

Driving home to retrieve the box and its accessories, I thought about the time I sat in my therapists office complaining to him how the world was against me. My proof was daily occurrences like- how the fast lane on the freeway suddenly became the slowest lane as soon as I entered it- or how the shortest, quickest line at the grocery store became the longest and slowest the moment I stepped into it. Or, how a brand new item I buy off the shelf in a store is mysteriously broken when I get it home and open it. With a smile, he told me that I was a perfectly normal human being and he knew this because the exact same, strangely occurring phenomenon also happen to him.

A mile from my exit I hit dead-stop traffic, and I wondered how late the Sprint store was open today. Glancing down at my watch I was reminded that the battery needs to be replaced...