Working Parents Struggle to Care for Themselves — Here's How to Change That

Shut off the alarm clock. Wake the kids and get them dressed. Take them to school. Drive to work and put in eight hours. Pick the kids up from daycare. Make dinner, go to sleep and repeat.

Does this sound familiar?

It's not uncommon for parents to never stop. While keeping up professional and personal responsibilities, they often forget about self-care. However, a hectic way of life is not the norm. It's vital to encourage parents to take time for themselves.

Why Don't Parents Take Care of Themselves?

Life changes when you have a baby. Suddenly, a new person exists who depends on you to survive. As such, your priorities change. Personal wants and goals go out the window. It's easy as a parent to put yourself second.

In some cases, parents feel it's selfish to take time for self-care. Shouldn't a child's needs always come before their own? Many parents claim the answer is yes. While 59% of parents say they spend enough time with their kids, more than half claim they lack time for hobbies and friends.

A balance between personal needs and children becomes more complicated when work is involved. Most people spend eight hours per day on the job. When they come home, free time is devoted to the kids. This schedule leaves no time to decompress. It may seem like there's not enough time to work and have a close-knit family.

Parents don't block out time for themselves for many reasons. However, taking a few minutes to yourself won't ruin your relationships. It's not always about the quantity of time we spend with a person — it's about quality. Focus on establishing deep-rooted bonds based on trust and love. Do an activity the whole family loves, like baking Friday night pizza or visiting the zoo.

Many people guilt themselves into ditching interests and friendships in favor of spending time with their kids 24/7. However, self-care makes you a better parent. If you're chronically stressed or depressed, it can affect your children. Establish a healthy diet and get plenty of exercise. You should also set a personal bedtime. A healthy and well-rested mom or dad is better equipped to handle the challenges of parenthood.

Remember, you set an example for your little ones. Teach them good habits — such as daily exercise and bedtimes — to instill lifelong values.

How Can I Encourage Someone — or Myself — to Try Self-Care?

Do you know a working parent in dire need of self-care? If so, address the issue as gently as possible. Formulate an opener to your conversation. Write down your main points so you can keep the conversation on track. If the discussion becomes emotional, these points will keep you level-headed.

Choose the right moment to bring up your concerns. Say your friend has a big work presentation on Thursday morning. Wednesday night wouldn't be an excellent time to host an intervention. Instead, choose a time and location where everyone feels relaxed. Try to avoid places that might exacerbate a reaction. For instance, if you're at a bar, alcohol could amplify emotions.

No matter how the talk goes, remember to be empathetic toward the balance working parents must strike. It's often intertwined with lots of emotions — love, stress and guilt, for starters. Navigate with compassion, because reality is hard to face for parents who want to do it all.

For encouragement, list ideas of how your loved one can spend time taking care of themselves, such as:

Journaling

A 20-minute writing session can help parents uncover feelings lingering beneath the surface. Plus, this daily practice reduces stress and boosts immune system response, among other benefits.

Friend dates

Parents tend to let friendships fall by the wayside when they have kids. A one-hour coffee date can work wonders. It re-strengthen bonds and gives grown-ups a much-needed break from daily routines.

Volunteer work

No activity cultivates feel-good vibes quite like volunteering. Parents can make a difference with just 15 minutes. Try calling a congressperson to your voice concerns, such as lack of snow clearance on streets with elderly residents. Little efforts can make a significant difference.

Physical activity

Exercise is a wonderful form of self-care. Block out a 30-minute slot on your agenda where you can break a sweat. You can also make exercise a family activity by heading to the park or popping in a workout video. According to one study, the average American child spends three to eight hours each day in front of a screen. Exercise is an excellent way for everyone to get fresh air and stretch muscles.

Are You a Struggling Parent? It's Time to Make the Change

In the end, it doesn't matter how a parent chooses to take care of him or herself. A few minutes of self-care can improve your state-of-mind and make you a better mom or dad. 

Remember, you can't force someone to partake in self-care. However, with a gentle conversation and a few good ideas, you may be able to convince someone to take the steps needed to become their best selves.